Dear Maternity Clothing Boutique Next to My Apartment Building,
Why do you tease me? Your windows are always filled with the most adorable and comfortable-looking clothing. Your selection is far superior to your sister boutique down the street, which features too many skinny jeans and oddly cropped jackets for my taste. Does my love of you mean that I dress like a mom? Why can't you make your clothes in non-pregnant styles? And why do I pause in your doorway at least once a week thinking "I could probably belt that"? I guess I'll just have to wait till I get knocked up to enjoy your wares.