Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dear Whore Who Threw Away My Peanut Butter,

[photo courtesy ndanger]


Dear Whore Who Threw Away My Peanut Butter,

I hope you are satisfied with your Very Important Enforcement of our company's Zero Tolerance Policy on food-labeling. I'm sure you felt very proud of yourself when you threw away my brand new jar of organic peanut butter, destroyed for the simple crime of not having a name. I'm sure you felt very smug as you rescued the Tupperware lunches of all your friends, while chucking mine in the trash.

And thanks especially for the uppity email you sent me. It really warmed my heart.

But just as an FYI, we're in a fucking recession here. And maybe you shouldn't go around throwing away perfectly good food and alienating your coworkers just to prove a point. It was a jar of peanut butter, not a moldy ham sandwich.

Sincerely,
A Displeased Recessionista


6 comments:

Movie Maven said...

This is so wrong for so many reasons. Your rage is justified.

robokat said...

awww bitches!

our company has a different policy of "we never throw away anything ever - even if it's growing mold on it."

i'm not kidding.

Your Ill-fitting Overcoat said...

MM -
THANK YOU FOR VALIDATING MY SEETHING RAGE.

Robokat -
Ok, that policy is not great either. My roommates may have formed the founding charter of that policy.

Miss T said...

As someone who eats PB, straight from the jar, several times a day, I can only say I would have done what any addict would do: cut that bitch.

miss clover said...

what a cunt.

Kinslerbot said...

SHE EMAILED YOU? omg.

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